Maintaining A Healthy Relationship

It appears to me that a lot of  couples these days, forget who they started out being. Many couples forget their roots. Once they start to live together, they seem to gradually lose the bonds that attracted them in the first place. Why is that?  Is it change, or is it terminal dis-interestry?  I don't think so. So why the drift? The truth is we just get too comfortable, and no longer put forth  the effort  that we did in the beginning. To repair the damage, an active program of preventative maintenance is required.

Think about your relationship, and how you and your lover interacted when the relationship was new—you will likely find that you had a lot more intimacy in the early days of your relationship. This would include more phone calls, texting, touching, kissing and other endearments . Those early connections not only moved the relationship forward initially, they are also instrumental in keeping the relationship fresh now.  It all used to come so easy with the excitement of having a new partner - do we have to let that excitement die? Some relationships were never meant to last, but of those that are, it is important that we actively pursue success.  Stress is the usual place to put the blame, but that is not always applicable.  All these issues were probably the same ones we've  dealt with in the past that made us closer in the first place.

If we are like most couples, we just get lazy. Both partners get into their comfort zone, and let things go,and before you know it their at that point where they never thought they'd be. Men might get in the habit of checking out other women and not paying attention to the one they are with.  Now, I am not putting any blame here - women can be guilty of this also. The issue is that we start to neglect each other in small ways that end up being very significant in the long run. We make each other feel less attractive, less desireable and less needed. Most times were even afraid to say something for fear of upsetting the other person even though their actions have made us angry. Both men and women need to be fearless in expressing their disapproval, and faultless in absorbing and trying to understand the complaints.  We must always be sensitive to our partner's feelings - to build a lifelong romance takes work, commitment, understanding and tolerance of each others viewpoints. Here are a few things we can do to make our relationships stay healthy:

1) Go out of your way to complement your partner each day. It will make both of you feel good.
2) Tell them you love them --- sometimes we don't hear this enough
3) Men have to stop staring at other women – it may be conditioned by advertising, but it is just demeaning to your partner. And women need to think about comments that they may make about other guys.
4)  Dishonesty is the root of all relationship dissension – make a habit of telling the truth, even if it might lead to embarrassing explanations.
5) No matter how busy you are, and other than sleeping at night, make sure you set aside at least an hour a day to be alone together
6) Talk to each other and make sure you bring up issues and work them through before they become an insurmountable obstacle.
7) Always start your day off with a kiss, and a hug, and a good morning- it starts your day off on a positive note, and it feels real good too.
8) Be spontaneous- flirt with each other-  a little kissing on a stairwell before work can be rather sexy, and keep your partner thinking about you throughout the day
9) Make sure that you smile and take life as the fun adventure that it is meant to be. You may think that frowning and being serious all the time is a way to get ahead in life, but in actual fact it works against you in your personal life, your relationships and in your professional business life as well.
10)  Make a point of never going to bed angry- whatever is bothering you talk it out, its not worth losing sleep over, and it starts your next day on a negative note. Make some time to snuggle when you get into bed....create a good night ritual. Some couples just get into their own sides of the bed, and that's it. I don't know about you, but  that is not my idea of a Good Night. Take a few moments to caress, and make going to sleep a wonderful thing knowing that you will be waking up beside your Prince or Princess in the morning.

Relationships are hard work but worth the effort. Keep at it so that your relationship becomes more play than work. When it becomes second nature to you, you have truly achieved the epiphany of satisfaction.
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