Showing posts with label Online Dating Dangers. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Online Dating Dangers. Show all posts
Friday, April 27, 2012
The Dangers of Online Dating
The Killer May Have Been the Date from Hell!
Sonia Varaschin was killed because she was lonely.
This worst case scenario emphasizes the inherent risks of meeting people online. Although the police were able to successfully research the victim's computer, it was too late to help Sonia.
When someone chooses a site like plentyoffish, they are actually seriously increasing their risk of exposure to predators. Let me clarify that comment.
I am not singling our plentyoffish.com, because other free online dating sites like OKcupid.com fall in the same camp. I will not try to list them all. Many sites walk the fine edge of maximum danger without actually realizing it.
The problem here is that any site that allows two people to communicate in any way for free is dangerous. Here is why.
There are lots of weirdos out there. Some are just lacking social skills, but others are sociopaths. There is a very real chance that someone who appears to be nice in a chat room is not so wonderful in real life, and the most dangerous ones are very clever at hiding their anti-social behavior. Of course the acme of risk resides with people who not only stalk you, but who seek to do you harm. They may think nothing of taking your life.
You may wonder why I am singling out free online dating sites, when in fact I am not.
This range of sites also includes facebook.com. You may think that it is safe to accept a friend request from the friend of a friend – after all you trust your friends. But in fact, your friend may very well be the type of person who always accepts friend requests without actually knowing the person. You are not safe unless you know which of your friends would never accept friend requests from unknown people.
Social networking sites that require some form of payment before allowing communication are inherently safer. The reason is that the payment process is a very easy trace for police to follow, and for that very reason, sociopaths and known sexual predators stay clear of these sites. On the other hand, it only takes them a few minutes to set up a string of bogus email account on yahoo ,then set up a phoney email account on gmail ,then delete the yahoo account. At that point you can now go into the gmail account and point the base email account to some fictitious email account on aol, and you have pretty much left a tough trail for police to track. Smart stalkers use a trail for free emails spanning several countries and corporate entities, thus becoming more invisible. Once the stalker has a largely untraceable email account on a free service like gmail, then they are free to use it to join all the free communication sites out there. If they couple this with a disposable cell phone, you are now fully communicating with someone who looks legit, but is untraceable by anyone. They are free to do what they please with you..
So what can you do about it?
Well the first, and most important step is to stay off of free social network dating sites. They are very risky.
The rest is just a lot of common sense:
1) Make sure you communicate online for a fair length of time before meeting in person. Make sure you do not let them know anything about who you are or where you live, or any outside contact information in the initial stages.
2) At the point where you want to hear their voice, use an untraceable cell phone or myprivateline.com.
3) When communicating, keep your bullshit filters set to maximum alert. Look for inconsistencies. Look for inconsistencies in what they tell you by asking similar questions and making sure that the answers line up consistently. Lack of consistency in answers is a danger signal – he might be just a BS artist, but it might be something worse. If a stalker is working on you, they are probably pursuing more than one person at the same time and will often mix up the lies.
4) Seek recent photos, and think of some way that you can verify that the photo is recent.
5) Make sure that they understand that you are just being careful. Genuine people will likely applaud your apparent paranoia. You must also be willing to do the same. Use a library and a recent newspaper from another town.
6) Your first date should be in a public place and you should meet him there, and do not go home with your date.
7) Use your camera phone and MMS it to a few friends. Then tell them what you have done that. If they have a problem with you doing this, then get out yesterday!
Use your head before you let yourself lose your heart.
Now if I have not totally freaked you out about online dating sites, here is a good resource page, check out the following link:
Online Dating Sites
Friday, November 18, 2011
Dating Online – Tips for Success
Online Dating Positives
One of the most amazing things that modern technology has offered to the human race is the entire new way that it is possible to meet someone new. Yes, I am talking about online dating sites. In the hundreds of thousands of years that human beings have been meeting and interacting with each other, there has never been anything that approaches the reach, the utility, and the convenience of online dating.
Up until recently, you were limited to whoever was in your immediate vicinity and social circle. Now, you can meet and woo anyone in the world. The most amazing thing is that you can look through what they say about themselves and shortlist a bunch of people that you are interested in that also have some things in common with you. On top of this, most dating systems have searching algorithms that will help you find all those people in the first place. It is just so amazingly easy.
Cons to Online Dating
Online dating sites are not foolproof. One problem is that people say what they are looking for, but they really do not know exactly what they want. People are much better at saying what they do not want in a partner than they are in saying what they want. Even so, people will often end up falling for someone who has many characteristics that they say they would not touch with a ten foot pole. On top of all that, online dating sites are the victims of members who exaggerate about themselves a lot, or just plain lie. For example, the hot young woman you think you’ve been chatting up online could be a 500 pound rat-catcher from Arsspik, Siberia. Or vise versa. Men and women both tend to post younger and more flattering pictures of themselves before they gained 40 pounds, and had more hair. You will never know if any of the people that you are chatting with are blowing smoke up your butt or not. As well, the person you are considering as a partner may be married, and looking to cheat. You don’t want to be part of that. Better to be involved with someone being honest to you, as well as his or her significant other.
The bigger dating sites will actually have millions of profiles for you to search through, and that is a curse! Even with the computerized help, the task is daunting. How can you zero in better? Of course if you are like me you just need to search for "deaf, dumb, oversexed female who owns liquor store"!
Other Online Dating Recommendations
A name like THREEINCHTOOL is unlikely to gain you much positive attention after all. Chose something that you can mention in mixed company, or better yet, to your minister. Another gem of advice is to let out your personal details gradually. Do not rush it. Slowly let the other person get to know you, and vise-versa. It’s safer. Talk on the phone a few times before meeting in person. Use a phone anonymizing service for the first few calls to protect you from any potential wackos that you might connect with.
Use a recent, accurate picture of yourself. If you present yourself the way that you actually are, there will be no disappointments when you first meet with her, and that will be a plus Do not put up a picture on your profile that you would be ashamed to show in public. You may be tempted to do something daring, but do not. You will only attract the wrong crowd. Also, although dating sites are supposed to be anonymous, pictures are not, and someone you know may recognize you, so do not put up any sort of compromising picture. Never complain about your current situation or your ex. Nobody likes to listen to a complainer. If pressed, admit to making a few mistakes and that you think you have learned from them. Also, make sure that you have more than one person that you are talking to at the same time. So many people stretch the truth in online dating that getting your hopes up on one specific person before you meet them is most likely to end in disappointment. So join several sites, preferably under different online names, and have 4 or 5 people on your active friends list at any one time. It is okay to date more than one person at a time until you are ready to commit. It is expected!
For your first in-person date when meeting someone after chatting online, there are some common sense moves you can make to ensure it goes smoothly. Choose a day date, first off. That way if you don’t hit it off, you can leave and still have your evening free. Second, if your date is not over coffee, set your phone alarm to go off a half hour into the date. That way, if it’s not going well, you can jet with an excuse. Lastly, let them know you’re also seeing other people. It is best to be honest, and ask them for the same thing.
If you have picked well, you have a strong chance of achieving instant chemistry, and potentially a lifetime of happiness. Bon Chance!
http://www.top100datingpersonals.com/
One of the most amazing things that modern technology has offered to the human race is the entire new way that it is possible to meet someone new. Yes, I am talking about online dating sites. In the hundreds of thousands of years that human beings have been meeting and interacting with each other, there has never been anything that approaches the reach, the utility, and the convenience of online dating.
Up until recently, you were limited to whoever was in your immediate vicinity and social circle. Now, you can meet and woo anyone in the world. The most amazing thing is that you can look through what they say about themselves and shortlist a bunch of people that you are interested in that also have some things in common with you. On top of this, most dating systems have searching algorithms that will help you find all those people in the first place. It is just so amazingly easy.
Cons to Online Dating
Online dating sites are not foolproof. One problem is that people say what they are looking for, but they really do not know exactly what they want. People are much better at saying what they do not want in a partner than they are in saying what they want. Even so, people will often end up falling for someone who has many characteristics that they say they would not touch with a ten foot pole. On top of all that, online dating sites are the victims of members who exaggerate about themselves a lot, or just plain lie. For example, the hot young woman you think you’ve been chatting up online could be a 500 pound rat-catcher from Arsspik, Siberia. Or vise versa. Men and women both tend to post younger and more flattering pictures of themselves before they gained 40 pounds, and had more hair. You will never know if any of the people that you are chatting with are blowing smoke up your butt or not. As well, the person you are considering as a partner may be married, and looking to cheat. You don’t want to be part of that. Better to be involved with someone being honest to you, as well as his or her significant other.
The bigger dating sites will actually have millions of profiles for you to search through, and that is a curse! Even with the computerized help, the task is daunting. How can you zero in better? Of course if you are like me you just need to search for "deaf, dumb, oversexed female who owns liquor store"!
Other Online Dating Recommendations
A name like THREEINCHTOOL is unlikely to gain you much positive attention after all. Chose something that you can mention in mixed company, or better yet, to your minister. Another gem of advice is to let out your personal details gradually. Do not rush it. Slowly let the other person get to know you, and vise-versa. It’s safer. Talk on the phone a few times before meeting in person. Use a phone anonymizing service for the first few calls to protect you from any potential wackos that you might connect with.
Use a recent, accurate picture of yourself. If you present yourself the way that you actually are, there will be no disappointments when you first meet with her, and that will be a plus Do not put up a picture on your profile that you would be ashamed to show in public. You may be tempted to do something daring, but do not. You will only attract the wrong crowd. Also, although dating sites are supposed to be anonymous, pictures are not, and someone you know may recognize you, so do not put up any sort of compromising picture. Never complain about your current situation or your ex. Nobody likes to listen to a complainer. If pressed, admit to making a few mistakes and that you think you have learned from them. Also, make sure that you have more than one person that you are talking to at the same time. So many people stretch the truth in online dating that getting your hopes up on one specific person before you meet them is most likely to end in disappointment. So join several sites, preferably under different online names, and have 4 or 5 people on your active friends list at any one time. It is okay to date more than one person at a time until you are ready to commit. It is expected!
For your first in-person date when meeting someone after chatting online, there are some common sense moves you can make to ensure it goes smoothly. Choose a day date, first off. That way if you don’t hit it off, you can leave and still have your evening free. Second, if your date is not over coffee, set your phone alarm to go off a half hour into the date. That way, if it’s not going well, you can jet with an excuse. Lastly, let them know you’re also seeing other people. It is best to be honest, and ask them for the same thing.
If you have picked well, you have a strong chance of achieving instant chemistry, and potentially a lifetime of happiness. Bon Chance!
http://www.top100datingpersonals.com/
Saturday, October 15, 2011
Killer Stalks on Plentyoffish
Death Follows For a First Time Meet In Person Date
Sonia Varaschin was killed because she was lonely.
This situation is a devastating example of the risks underscoring any situation where you meet someone on the internet. In this case, the victim's computer was researched for leads, but the real tragedy is the victim's choice of sites.
When Sonya chose a site like plentyoffish.com she actually maximized her risks, and I must qualify this.
I am not singling our plentyoffish.com, because other free online dating sites like OKcupid.com fall in the same camp. I will not try to list them all. Many sites walk the fine edge of maximum danger without actually realizing it.
At issue here is the free dating model in general. Here is why.
There are many social misfits out there. Some are just lacking social skills, but others are sociopaths. It is very possible that the apparently nice guy that you are chatting to on the Internet is actually possessive and abusive in real life. Of course the acme of risk resides with people who not only stalk you, but who seek to do you harm. They may think nothing of taking your life.
So why am I singling out the free communication dating sites? Well actually I am not!
Other social networking sites like facebook also have this problem. You may think that it is safe to accept a friend request from the friend of a friend – after all you trust your friends. But in fact, your friend may very well be the type of person who always accepts friend requests without actually knowing the person. You are not safe unless you know which of your friends would never accept friend requests from unknown people.
If you are communicating on any site that requires payment of some sort to enable the communication, then you are inherently safer from the get-go. Sexual predators stay clear of pay sites because the money is too easy to trace back to them. It only takes them a few minutes to set up a string of fake email account on yahoo using a real email account as reference, then set up a bogus email account on gmail ,then delete the yahoo account. Now just tie the gmail account to a fictitious email on AOL and it makes it tough to track you. The really smart stalkers will use a free email account trail crossing providers based in several different countries so that police have to do tons of paperwork to get access to the records. With a fist full of untraceable email accounts your typical sexual predator can join free social networking sites to their heart's content. If they couple this with a disposable cell phone, you are now fully communicating with someone who looks legit, but is untraceable by anyone. They are free to do what they please with you..
So what can you do about it?
Well the first, and most important step is to stay off of free social network dating sites. They expose you to unnecessary danger.
The rest is just a lot of common sense:
1) Make sure you communicate online for a fair length of time before meeting in person. Keep all details about who you really are or where you live private until you know them better.
2) At some point use a disposable phone yourself, or else take advantage of an anonymous phone service, like MyPrivateLine.com, which offers a disposable number that lets you talk to strangers without revealing your phone number.
3) Before you commit your heart, make sure you are doing due diligence on this person. Be careful with what you say, and listen carefully to what is said. Consider recording the call so you can take notes after. Look for changes in the lines that they string you. Ask for the same information a few different ways over the course of your initial acquaintance and make sure the answers are consistent. Lack of consistency in answers is a danger signal – he might be just a BS artist, but it might be something worse. Stalkers usually have more than one potential victim that they are stringing along, and will often confuse details in what they tell each mark.
4) Seek recent photos, and think of some way that you can verify that the photo is recent.
5) Tell them that you are being careful right off the get-go. Genuine people will likely applaud your apparent paranoia. You should be prepared to do the same for them. Consider using the public library and use a current newspaper from a different town to keep your location secret.
6) Your first date should be in a public place and you should meet him there, and do not go home with your date.
7) Use your camera phone and MMS it to a few friends. Then tell them what you have done that. If they do not like that, then to bad. But now get out right away!
Use your head before you lose your heart so you can keep both.
If you are still interested in paid online dating, check out the following link:
Online Dating Sites
Sonia Varaschin was killed because she was lonely.
This situation is a devastating example of the risks underscoring any situation where you meet someone on the internet. In this case, the victim's computer was researched for leads, but the real tragedy is the victim's choice of sites.
When Sonya chose a site like plentyoffish.com she actually maximized her risks, and I must qualify this.
I am not singling our plentyoffish.com, because other free online dating sites like OKcupid.com fall in the same camp. I will not try to list them all. Many sites walk the fine edge of maximum danger without actually realizing it.
At issue here is the free dating model in general. Here is why.
There are many social misfits out there. Some are just lacking social skills, but others are sociopaths. It is very possible that the apparently nice guy that you are chatting to on the Internet is actually possessive and abusive in real life. Of course the acme of risk resides with people who not only stalk you, but who seek to do you harm. They may think nothing of taking your life.
So why am I singling out the free communication dating sites? Well actually I am not!
Other social networking sites like facebook also have this problem. You may think that it is safe to accept a friend request from the friend of a friend – after all you trust your friends. But in fact, your friend may very well be the type of person who always accepts friend requests without actually knowing the person. You are not safe unless you know which of your friends would never accept friend requests from unknown people.
If you are communicating on any site that requires payment of some sort to enable the communication, then you are inherently safer from the get-go. Sexual predators stay clear of pay sites because the money is too easy to trace back to them. It only takes them a few minutes to set up a string of fake email account on yahoo using a real email account as reference, then set up a bogus email account on gmail ,then delete the yahoo account. Now just tie the gmail account to a fictitious email on AOL and it makes it tough to track you. The really smart stalkers will use a free email account trail crossing providers based in several different countries so that police have to do tons of paperwork to get access to the records. With a fist full of untraceable email accounts your typical sexual predator can join free social networking sites to their heart's content. If they couple this with a disposable cell phone, you are now fully communicating with someone who looks legit, but is untraceable by anyone. They are free to do what they please with you..
So what can you do about it?
Well the first, and most important step is to stay off of free social network dating sites. They expose you to unnecessary danger.
The rest is just a lot of common sense:
1) Make sure you communicate online for a fair length of time before meeting in person. Keep all details about who you really are or where you live private until you know them better.
2) At some point use a disposable phone yourself, or else take advantage of an anonymous phone service, like MyPrivateLine.com, which offers a disposable number that lets you talk to strangers without revealing your phone number.
3) Before you commit your heart, make sure you are doing due diligence on this person. Be careful with what you say, and listen carefully to what is said. Consider recording the call so you can take notes after. Look for changes in the lines that they string you. Ask for the same information a few different ways over the course of your initial acquaintance and make sure the answers are consistent. Lack of consistency in answers is a danger signal – he might be just a BS artist, but it might be something worse. Stalkers usually have more than one potential victim that they are stringing along, and will often confuse details in what they tell each mark.
4) Seek recent photos, and think of some way that you can verify that the photo is recent.
5) Tell them that you are being careful right off the get-go. Genuine people will likely applaud your apparent paranoia. You should be prepared to do the same for them. Consider using the public library and use a current newspaper from a different town to keep your location secret.
6) Your first date should be in a public place and you should meet him there, and do not go home with your date.
7) Use your camera phone and MMS it to a few friends. Then tell them what you have done that. If they do not like that, then to bad. But now get out right away!
Use your head before you lose your heart so you can keep both.
If you are still interested in paid online dating, check out the following link:
Online Dating Sites
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